RV living is amazing.

Of all the places we have lived so far, my husband and I love our RV the most. For years we dreamed of a small home we could call our own, escaping from the rent trap and having the freedom to put our own stamp on the place we lived (without fear that the landlord would not approve). 

We wanted to move away from an area that was bustling and growing and find a place where we could unplug a bit and live at a slower, more intentional pace. After years of planning and failed attempts, we were finally able to make it work. Generous friends allowed us to live on their land with our RV in exchange for being the caretakers. It was a dream come true! 

Our time has been a challenge, but worth every moment of struggle. There are many tips and tricks for making the most of RV living, and some of those I will share elsewhere, but this article is really about helping you answer the question of what a family needs to understand — what they need to be ready for overall — if they are going to live full time in an RV. 

Use What You Have - Microsteading

Unlike many in the RV world, we did not dream of touring the country in our home. We dreamed of putting down roots, having a garden, and transforming something barren into something beautiful. We wanted to experiment with a little homesteading and DIY-ing for ourselves. We wanted to “micro-stead” as my husband calls it. So that is what we did. 

Although the land was in the middle of a forest, it had been bulldozed to create a clearing so it was literally a large swath of dust and dirt. Here was our chance to start from scratch. We knew that our stay on the land would be temporary — five years or so until we could hopefully afford some land of our own, but we decided to invest some in the place anyway and see what we were capable of creating. 

We planted grass, spreading the seed by hand, and created pathways and patios from basic pavers and the plethora of rock we encountered every time we tried to plant anything in the ground. By the end of our work, we were rich in rocks and used them everywhere! We built a garden and greenhouse and I worked for about a year on a stone spiral meditation path, digging up each rock myself and placing them all by hand. 

The lesson here is to use what you have. We had rocks, so that’s what we landscaped with. We had forests and deer, which changed many of the choices we made. We worked with the land we were on, not against it (though I admit to an eternal, losing struggle with the hungry local deer).

Make It Yours - Personalization 

Our RV was nice, but very RV-ish, with the bulky furniture and silly built-ins. It all had to go! Of course we were on a tight budget, so the upgrades needed to be thought-out and DIY friendly. 

All of the furniture was removed as well as the dresser and bathroom sink. We replaced those with upgrades from Ikea, giving us a real sink and a larger bookcase that made a more storage-friendly dresser. 

We ordered a real toilet seat, built a bed for our son, added shelving and industrial pipes as plant hangers. We turned the loft space into storage that was hidden by a bookcase and a cute basket where extra toiletries were tucked away. We painted all of the trim and window cases white and I sewed up some faux-linen curtains to lighten everything up. 

Not satisfied yet, we took out the tiny propane oven and replaced it with a larger convection oven we could bake bread in and used an induction burner. Our biggest investment came when we replaced the peeling kitchen countertops with live-edge wood counters made from local Big Leaf Maple. This completely transformed our space and with the piano hinged leaf we added, we also gained a ton of surface area for crafts, cooking, eating, homework, etc.

The list of tweaks and touches goes on and on, and we were loving every minute of it. It was our home, and it really felt homey. We loved it!

Be Consistent - Patience

As a family of four, RV living is not always a breeze. There are some traffic jams in the hallway, laundry drying in the shower (ventless washer/dryer combos have some issues), and short tempers when our son wants to make battle noises while my husband is trying to work. We’ve had to work out some kinks. But that is the beauty of living in an RV.

Some things require more work than they did before, and I think that is a very good thing. In a time where we have nearly everything at our fingertips in an instant, I think we could use a few more tasks that require time and patience. At least, my family does. 

I have always taught my son that anything worth doing is worth doing right, and that it is always better for him to take his time and do a thing all the way. I don’t want to see him “kind of” fold his clothes. I want to see his best effort, no matter how imperfect the result. 

For the first year and a half that we lived in our RV we had to manually go outside, rain, sun, or snow, and flip on a switch to pump water into our holding tank. Depending on the number of dishes, showers, and laundry that occurred, we would fill the pump multiple times a day. 

When we want to dry our clothes, we have to hang each one. In the summer I put them outside on a line but in the winter they go on different racks in our bathroom or even living room to sit by the heater. It takes time, it can get in the way, and we have to do it consistently. 

We also have to empty our black and grey water tanks regularly and deodorize them. We need to keep dehumidifiers running in the winter to avoid mildew and water build-up, and there are places where condensation needs to be wiped up in the morning. The list could go on, but I think you get the point.

There is work to be done. It could get frustrating, but I find that I am grateful for it. 

Love It For What It Is - Gratitude

I am grateful that God has given us a space of our own and entrusted us with keeping it clean and bright. I truly love taking care of my family and our space. I consider it all a privilege and feel very satisfied when all the tasks of the day are done, even though I know full well that they will just need to be done again the next day. 

That doesn’t mean I am a glutton for punishment or that I want to add to my to-do list just for fun. But I do appreciate that this RV life has allowed us to achieve a slower pace, enjoy where we are at, and appreciate the conveniences we do have — all the more because of those that we have given up.  

I honestly do not miss most of the conveniences we left behind, possibly because I went into this life with my eyes open. I knew some things would be different, but instead of seeing those things as set-backs or ways that our life was lacking, I saw them as a challenge and a gift.

I was glad to see what we were made of and how we could innovate in the space we had. I felt grateful that we could thrive in a new environment and learn a little patience and respect for things along the way. 

Have Less to Live More - Declutter

Beyond the tasks, we also had storage and clutter to consider. My husband and I were sentimental people who liked to collect things related to our hobbies and interests. So we had a lot of clothes, books, figurines, etc. We downsized a lot in order to move into the RV. One challenge I set for us, to prove that we could make it, was to downsize and declutter way before we bought the RV. 

My husband used his graphic design skills to map out the RV and the storage spaces so I could see how (or if) our furniture and totes would work. We found that we were excited enough about our dream RV home to get rid of a lot and moving in was easy. Everything fit just as we had mapped it out. 

But since it had ample storage we found ourselves holding onto a lot. Clutter would start again, and again we would have to declutter our space. We tried new ways of organizing and getting rid of clutter, and got better each time we went through the process.

We were a team, just trying to figure out how to make the most of the life we chose. The challenge was often fun, and I loved getting smarter with storage in my son’s room and the living area. We found new and even more attractive ways to arrange our things, while still letting go of the excess.

One of the biggest challenges has been our son, who seems to have inherited our old ways — loving little items and wanting to sentimentally keep everything. We have spent a lot of time teaching him that real value is not in the item itself but in the love and memories it represents — something that can never be lost, broken, or taken from him. I think he is finally starting to understand, because when I get caught up worrying about an item, he comes over and in his wise 6 year old way gently reminds me that “It’s only stuff, remember? It isn’t the most important thing.” I wonder where he heard that ;) 

Honor Each Other’s Space - Mindfulness

In a small space, you must be mindful of each other. You need to care about where you are and where other people need to be. You can’t mindlessly take up space with your body or your things. They need a place, and so do you. We have found that each member of our family has naturally claimed a space that they tend to be in, and have learned to show love for each other in making space and taking turns. 

Of course these are lessons every family should learn, but I think you learn them in a very acute way when you share less than 400 square feet. If you don’t learn those lessons, as we have seen in struggles with our son, then 400 square feet starts to feel like 4, and no one has peace. But if you look out for each other, move out of the way, ask if someone needs the bathroom, etc, then you have so many chances in the day to show love. 

You have so many opportunities to put someone else before yourself, and that strengthens the heart in a way that not much else can. It creates awareness and care, and vividly reminds us that we are in control of our actions and every little thing we do matters because it impacts someone else. 

The Value of RV Living — You Can Do It! And You Should!

Through RV living we have learned the value of what we have — that we actually are quite happy with having less — and that there is a space for everyone as long as we respect each other’s needs. 

We have learned what we are capable of and how to solve problems in new ways with very little guidance. We are microsteaders and pioneers in our own little world and that is the kind of world that awaits your family as well. If you are still wondering whether a family of four can really do this RV life, the answer depends on you. 

If you want to know whether I recommend you try it, the answer is a resounding yes!

You can do this. Your family can do it. Things will not always be easy. In fact, I promise that they will be messy and sometimes very confusing. But they will be beautiful, simplified, and ripe for growth. That is what an RV life can give to you — all of you — if you let it. 

Have you had a similar experience? Do you have any insights to share with us? Let me know in the comments. I’d love to hear from you! 

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Disclaimer: This is a blog, which contains a mixture of my current knowledge and opinions. The information is accurate to the best of my knowledge but may contain omission, errors, or mistakes. I am a psychologist licensed to practice in the state of Washington, but this article does not create a psychologist-client relationship. I am providing psychological information and my own opinions for informational purposes only, and anything I present should not be seen as psychological, emotional, or medical advice or treatment. You should consult with a mental health professional or your primary care physician before you rely on this information or take any action. I reserve the right to change how I manage or run my blog and may change the focus or content at any time.